New #15: Listen to a Book on Tape (or CD)

This isn't really the first time I've ever listened to a book on tape. In fact, as kids my sister and I were a bit of book-on-tape-aholics. Whether we were driving around town or on a road trip across the country, we were more than happy sitting in the back seat listening to stories about the Care Bears and Ninja Turtles over and over and over again. Just keep flipping that tape Mom, because these 15-minute gems are never gettin' old.

To this day I don't understand what we found so amusing about listening to the same exact story not just 100 times, but 100 times in a row. As an adult, I decided it was time to see if I could rediscover some of that same allure by once again inviting a dramatic voice to read to me through my stereo. However, as a new, I decided to give chapter books a try.

I went to the library without a book in mind and decided to see what caught my eye. After a bit of browsing, it came down to "Pride and Prejudice," an ripened classic, and "Armageddon's Children," which as far as I can tell, is still fermenting its critical acclaim. Obviously, I went for tackier of the two. Some people like romance. I like post-apocalyptic suffering.

While I haven't finished "reading" the book yet (it's over 14 hours long), I am enjoying the journey of the characters during my own travels to work. It's a much different experience than curling up at home with the book in my lap, eyes glued to the page. Instead, by having the story read to me, I get to continue physically moving forward with my day during a time when I wouldn't otherwise be able to actually read a book. It's nice to let my mind wonder into the work of fiction while my own mundane drive passes by. Also, in my own sick way, I'm finding it fun to watch the scenery go by and imagine it during the end-of-life-as-we-know-it future told in the story. But that's just me. Overall, having the book read to me lets me feel like I'm doing something productive during a 20-minute drive that's usually wasted flipping through the radio.

However, I must admit the audio version of the book leaves much to be desired. There's the narrator, to start. Yeah, maybe everyone likes the sound of their own voice the best - but this guy is pretty bad. He is overly dramatic and always overacting, which is especially funny (and annoying) when he's trying to read the characters' dialogue. No matter how hard he attempts to throw his voice, this burly man can never quite convince me he's a 12-year-old girl. I'm honestly just amazed he tries.

Then there's the stuttering. Not the narrator, but the CD itself. Some listener before scratched the whole thing up, leaving me often stuck with one word being repeated eight times over before the disc can skip forward. That's never happened to me reading my own paperback - no matter how much wine I've had to drink.

And besides these minor quirks that come with the reader and technology, the idea of an audiobook just kinda feels like cheating. It's kind of like watching a book's movie and then trying to analyze the original literature. So much is laid out for you in the narrator's voice and tone. It's not the same as setting your own dramatic pace of the story, creating the characters' voices in your head and flipping through the pages one by one.

But then again, maybe I'm being overcritical. People have read to each other through the ages. And even if this person is just a digital voice playing in my stereo, it's still transforming my Point A to Point B drive into a brief journey into the author's ideas. In the end, I guess that's what books - whether read or heard - are all about.