New #44: Partake in a Study

I like Guinea pigs ... I've just never wanted to be one myself. At least until this latest money-making venture presented itself.

I was surfing Craigslist under gigs when I found a call for volunteers to partake in a potato study. It promised free potato samples and $30. Free food would have been enough for me, so I enthusiastically signed up.

The study was held at the university -- although many of the other 20-or-so participants looked less than scholarly. I tried especially hard to ignore one young faux-homeless couple who kept drawing on each others' arms, hugging and smooching to the point of almost making out. Right in the middle of the science! I mean, I like potatoes and all, but control yourself. I ignored them the best I could so I didn't spew my spuds.

Luckily the test started off simply, with a questionnaire about my potato habits and desires. I also had to rate different aspects of potatoes -- many of which I'd never thought of before, including how much I care about the vegetable's skin texture, starch resistance and antioxidant proprieties. Usually baked or fried is my biggest concern.

After the survey it was time to taste. We had three rounds of samples, starting with rating the look and appeal of some raw spuds. Luckily we didn't have to eat those. I gave them all high marks except the lady pinto potato, which was brown and purple and looked like it had leprosy. It got "unappealing."

Then we were handed five cups of sliced microwaved potatoes, followed by five more of the same variety that had been baked. We had to rate how bitter, salty, sour and sweet each one tasted, as well what it felt like in our mouth using adjectives like "dense, light, gummy and moist." Again, I've never thought this much about spuds. My favorites proved to be the gross-looking but great-tasting lady pinto potato and the purple majesty. The Aspen potato tasted like ass.

Finally, in the grand finale, we had a potato auction. Basically I had to write down the amount I'd be willing to pay for a bag of each potatoes. The winner would actually buy the item with real money. I guess this was to find out the market value for the items. I bid pretty low on most of the potatoes, but the purple majesties had my heart. I bid a whopping $2.50. And what do you know? I won!

I left the study with a full tummy, $27.50, a bag of purple potatoes and a new experience under my belt. Oh, and the results will help the potato people of America better price and market their spuds. Now I'm happy to add Guinea pig to my list of occupations.